Ted's IC Inbox

[youfool]

These are necessary, I discovered! Any private message to Ted's communicator will go here, if you please, so I may treasure it forever.

Comments

[youfool]

Do they have names?

[He should know how much Ted likes those. What he very much dislikes is putting others in danger for any reason, even if it is for getting them acclimatized to dangerous things. He may be the wrong man for the job.]

[om_nom_namur]

One's Django. Yer gonna hate 'im. Try not t' murder his ass. Or at least call me if y' do cuz I might wanna help.

Other's Seventeen.

[Because leaving it there won't cause any miscommunication whatsoever, amirite?]

[youfool]

[He's spoken with Django and read both of their network posts, so he likes to think he knows their character pretty well.]

Because he's undead, I take it? Well, that's not his fault, to hear him tell it. Still, he's dishonest and amoral. I'd rather not have a hand in his hire. Besides, he's in middle school. Or ought to be. That's far too young for that kind of danger.

[Good of an excuse as any, even if Sync is technically far younger than that.]

17, on the other hand, seems all right and more than capable of handling himself. Though I'm curious why he's interested in this over, say, wildlife preservation, especially with what the paper just reported.

[om_nom_namur]

Naw, cuz I think he's a necromancer. So have a hand in his unhire then, yeah? Can't finish the test run, ain't a good fit for the job, catch me?

Hell if I know why the other's applyin' here. Maybe he'll do both. 'S part time, after all.

[youfool]

Goodness! What makes you say that? Is there some reason we can't turn Django down frankly and flatly?

[om_nom_namur]

Listen, Ted. As the boss I gotta come off as bein' fair, an' not a discriminatin' asshole. 'S part a why I had Zoro doin' that shit for me in the first place. Ain't nothin' franker nor flatter'n sorry boy, y' failed the test. Don't come back. Get it?

[youfool]

[Much as he loathes necromancy, he'd prefer to avoid all contact with their kind, rather than spend time humiliating them. All for Namur's image? Eh, fine.]

If you think it necessary.

[om_nom_namur]

Wouldn't a asked y' if I didn't. But I also ain't gonna force y' t' do somethin' y' ain't up for. Jus' figured y's the best fit since y' can get yerself outta any trouble some dumbass might getcha int', an' yer good at disguises an' shit. Plus y' had t' do a Zoro walk yerself, so y' know what I'm divin' at when I say that. Got a few locals I could probly hit up that'd do a'ight if y'd rather.

[youfool]

[Yikes! If he's planning on making someone do it regardless, it might as well be him.]

No, no! That's all right! It's fine; I'm game!

[Heart attack abating...]

So, ah, what did he say in his application?

[om_nom_namur]

[Duh, obviously! Didn't he just get done saying he's got to be fair and shit? He made y'all go through it, he's gonna make the newbs do it too.]

'Bout the same everbody else does. Hey I'm intrested, I know how t' fight, I got 'nuff of a brain t' find 'nother way if someone too badass comes 'round. The usual shit.

[Namur shrugs.]

[youfool]

Sans the part where he led you to believe he's a necromancer. That fact didn't, conspicuously, make it into any of his public network posts.

Come on, Namur, at least let me know what exactly I'm dealing with. There must be more to it than that.

[om_nom_namur]

Oh. Well that was the other way a dealin' with shit. Said he'd summon up some minions t' cause a distraction. 'S why I made 'im promise he wouldn't be enslavin' nobody. Then this li'l shit says, well he ain't never done it, he's jus' sure he could cuz his grandma done it or some shit, an' I's jus' like, y' shittin' me? Sheheheheh!

Anyway I can see my way t' wantin' t' keep 'im close, so I can keep an eye on 'im an' try t' keep 'im in check. But lettin' 'im be someone else's problem t' deal with's got appeal, too. Whatcha think?

[youfool]

Hah, what, we're to serve as his surrogate conscience?

[Granted, they do that, again, for Sync, but his circumstances were unique. His eyes drift to the side, thinking.]

...Everglade's atmosphere wouldn't do much to edify Django, I'm afraid, whatever we intended. He is visiting a gentler, older mage of the skeletal persuasion. Elias can probably take that trouble.

[om_nom_namur]

Hell naw I ain't bein' nobody's conscience. Ain't y' ever heard 'em say keep yer friends close an' yer enemies closer? Dumbass starts pullin' shit we'll be the first t' know an' the quickest t' deal with it. Know how I feel 'bout slavers. Don't think for a second I'mma let that shit fly if I coulda done somethin' t' stop it.

[He chuckles a little.]

'Sides. The hell y' think happens t' a person that breaks a promise they made t' a pirate?

[youfool]

[Ted turns a little dolorous. Granted, Namur would make a very poor conscience, but no desire whatsoever? On top of that, it seemed like he wanted to make enemies out of necromancers, i.e. the most dangerous, torturous kind one could . Ted was hoping he'd keep that unenviable position all to himself, without anyone--particularly his friends--taking the heat.

Thankfully the subject of pirate honor comes up, allowing him a much-needed comedic break for the oxymoron.]

Hmmff, I don't know; walking the plank? In literature they're not exactly the oath-keeping type, what with their fondness for marooning.

He's not an enemy yet, Namur. If you're not interested in steering him on a better path, I'd rather leave him in the hands of one keener.

[om_nom_namur]

Get the whole damn crew on yer ass. Why the hell y' think folk wind up gettin' keelhauled in the first place?

A'ight, well. Fails the road test, he's out. Leave the objectives up t' y'.

[He winks.]

[youfool]

I'll be sure to think of tough, but fair criterion.

[aka stacking the deck so very, very hard]